Goodies Galore

Learning to focus less on dieting and more on overall health and wellness

Morning adventures of a self proclaimed bad driver

Oh my gosh, I almost got my ass kicked by a newspaper at 5 this morning. I was driving to meet my friend for a run and the newspaper truck pulled over, waving his hand frantically for me to pass. So I did. I made a right turn onto my friend road and was driving rather slow to find a parking space. I couldn’t find one so I went to do a quick u-turn without my blinker (it was 5 am??!!) and as I was turning, the newspaper truck was in the process of passing me. I didn’t even know he was still behind me so we both slammed on our brakes. He kind of jolted to the side and all the sudden all his newspapers  tumbled out the front door onto the street. I gasped frantically. Normally I would stop and help him gather the goods but my gut told me to get the hell outta dodge. Two minutes later I get a text saying, “Was that you” from  my friend who had been standing outside when all of this went down. Apparently he was screaming on the top of his lungs (at 5 am?!!) “F*** As**hole, F*** you, F-ing Sh**” over and over again. When I eventually looped back around I could still see his truck parked. My heart was beating so fast but luckily he pulled away without trying to stab me to death. Phew, close call.

Despite my morning mishap, I woke up feeling refreshed and ready to make some changes to make this season the best Fall ever. I love Autumn and really want to feel my absolute best to make it even better. As many of you know, I am at constant battle with food. Most of the time, food wins. I have a great relationship with exercise and am happy to be helping my body in that way. Now that the working out part  is covered, I need some healing with food. You see, I do have a plan in my head about how this might happen but details are for later. Just trust that change is in the air and it starts now.

I have a confession. I killed something.

I gave it light and water but apparently it’s more needy than that. Sorry plant. You were delicious while you lasted.

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September 2, 2010 Posted by | eating disorder | 13 Comments

Shoulder dog?

This morning I am blogging from Vermont. We decided to take an impromptu trip yesterday since we didn’t really have any plans. Last night we made a pit stop in New Hampshire to watch his step dad race. If you’ve never been to a race car track, it’s quite the scene. Picture obese men, women and kids, pregnant women smoking, and lots of excitement. It’s no wonder people are obese there, the food is AMAZING. I had a big thing of french fries.

They drive so quick I could barely capture it

crashhhhh

I cannot imagine driving in a situation like this but then I remember what a maniac I am on the road. This might be my calling.

I love visiting Lens family because they have a lab names Sadie and Eleanor plays really well with her. (Note–Eleanor is very dominant and doesn’t have many friends.)

I'm the boss

tug it out

Embarrassingly enough, Eleanor is also the boss of us. She rules the bed and she rules the car. See pictures for proof.

See, Eleanor loves taking rides. Most often she resides on my lap in the passenger seat. I’m not a small woman and she weights 50 pounds so it’s an understatement to say it’s pretty tight up there. When things get too tight, Ellie decides to reside on my shoulder. My dog’s a parrot.  Sometimes she stands on my chest with her butt hole in my face. It’s lovely and very, very safe. What do you let your dog get away with?

Let’s move on, shall we?

A couple of days ago, Attune sent me to Glastonbury, Ct to work an event at Whole Foods. Let me tell ya, that Whole Foods has it hooked up! They had all sorts of goodies that Boston Whole Foods don’t have, including…….wait for it….. make your own granola. Yep, true story.

They have bins of different granola for a base and a bunch of different add ins: chocolate, nuts, seeds, dried fruits, etc.

I didn’t DARE buy any because that would be a binge in the making.  Speaking of binge, my weigh in this weekend was rather disappointing but not unexpected considering the way I’ve been eating. I MUST start to limit sugar and white flour in my diet. They are addicting and I am a full-blown addict. Moderation is not a word I know.  So the challenge for this week is to be mindful of the white stuff. Wish me luck!

Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend.

August 22, 2010 Posted by | Attune bar, dogs, eating disorder, Food, The Boyfriend, Weigh In | 12 Comments

I haven’t been around much this week on my blog but I assure you it’s been a slow week. A few exciting things.

1. I finally got my period. Ever since I turned into a psychopath and went off the pill in October, aunt flow comes around every 6 or 7 weeks. What’s that about anyway? Some people would love that schedule but not this one. See, I still expect my period every four weeks so around week three, PMS kicks in. Well, at least that’s what I tell myself. This means bloating, bitchiness, crying over everything, chocolate cravings–you know how it goes. Then those symptoms drag on. And on. And on. For weeks. How I have friends still I’ll never know.

2. After almost a year of not dieting, I joined Weight Watchers. You should know that in the past I’ve joined WW about 2, 672 times. This is not an exaggeration. So why would I set myself up to fail again? Well, I’m taking a different approach this time. In the past I would stop  counting if I had a binge. Not this time folks. I will plug every last bite of carrot cake, fajita, and candy that touches my lips. (That may or may not have been my dinner menu last night.)

I also wanted a way to monitor my calories and exercise. In the last few months, I’ve increased my workouts dramatically yet I haven’t lost any weight. Yeah, yeah, I’ve gained some muscle but still, I want weight loss. It’s no surprise why the weight’s not melting off, I overindulge everyday, several times. I need to get a grip and am hoping weight watchers will help me reign it in a little. If Jhud can do it……

With that said, I totally forgot about my Saturday morning weigh-in because I was too focused on my new WW weigh-in days. Sorry about that. Just assume there was a gain. Trust me. Speaking of packing on the pounds, is it me or does it appear that Miss. Eleanor is filling out too?

That's so not cool, mom.

Our weight gains may be contributed to all the dog treats I’ve been baking up. Yep, I eat them too. With butter.  Sure do.

3. I’ve been reading a wonderful and informative book called An Unquiet Mind. It’s about a Psychiatrist with a history of Manic Depressive Disorder, also known as Bipolar Disorder. It’s well written and so interesting. I would definitely recommend it to one of my clients or anyone who struggles with this mental illness.

Yes, that’s some kind of stain on the bottom corner. This is what happens when you’re a slob.

I blame mania for my impulsive decision to look into being a foster-mother on Saturday morning. It seems like a fairly easy application process and I think I’d be a wonderful foster mommy to one of the many kids who need love.  When I sent Len a text at 7:30 in the morning (he’s away again) saying, “We’re applying to be foster parents! Hope that’s okay”, he chalked it up to my everyday ridiculousness and responded with “dog fostering?”. Yes, babe, dog fostering.  Maybe next year. I’m coming for you kiddies!

Enjoy this beautiful Sunday!

August 8, 2010 Posted by | dogs, eating disorder, Food, Friends, The Boyfriend, Weigh In, Workout | 13 Comments

New goodies!

I haven’t posted much about food lately which is a shame because I’ve been munching on some damn good things. Last night I ate strawberry shortcake with melted peanut butter and jelly over it. TO.DIE. I wanted to kick my own ass when I realized I didn’t take a picture but should have. Today I made a crafty sandwich of avocado, light cheese and hot sauce! By the time I ate it I totally forgot there was hot sauce involved so apparently I didn’t use enough.

At the grocery store tonight I picked up two new purchases…. wait for it… wait..

Buffalo sauce marinade!

Skinny Cow Caramel Cone single serving cup. Freaking awesome but could really use more caramel cones.

I had therapy tonight and Mimi thinks I’m making some progress. I think I am too, actually. Today, I had a piece of cake at work. I didn’t have a mental war over it. I just ate it and moved on. I didn’t binge, just moved on. For a binger by nature, this is a success. I also brought a huge piece home for Len (see to the left) and haven’t touched it. She also told me that obese people who binge have a better chance at losing weight (with work, of course) than naturally obese people. Genetics suck!

P.S. I got hired for (very) part time outpatient work. My hours are Tuesday 9-2.Yahoooo!! Let’s hope my clients show up, otherwise I don’t get paid.

May 27, 2010 Posted by | eating disorder, Food, therapy | 11 Comments

Slowest week ever!

It feels like it should be next week already!

I can tell it’s going to be a processed food kind of day. After boot camp this morning I spotted my second and last Banana Bread Clif bar and knew I had to have it. It worked out perfectly with a cup of hot coffee.

Then I peered in the freezer to find a Lean Cuisine Spinach and Mushroom Pizza calling my name. I packed that bad boy for lunch with a spinach and strawberry salad–try to even things out a bit. Since starting the blog, I realized that I don’t eat much fruit. I always pack it but almost never eat it…. Hopefully todays apple will be gobbled right up.

What are your favorite processed foods? Mine are desserts and bagels. Can’t quite narrow it down to only one.

Did anyone watch The Biggest Loser last night? They had to face a day of temptations (for breakfast, lunch and dinner) with the most amazing foods ever! I could feel the internal battle that each contestant faced as they decided to eat the calories or not. Food is some powerful shit.

Did I mention how awesome my heart rate monitor is? Too bad I only burned 400 calories at booty this morning. BOOOO!

Later Gators!

April 21, 2010 Posted by | Boot camp, Clif Bar, eating disorder, Food | 15 Comments

Food, food, blah, blah, blah.

First, let’s recap some eats from the past couple of days and get that out-of-the-way.

left over GB casserole and eggplant parm healthy style.

Kick ass wrap with spinach, peppers, avocado and soy meatballs in vinegar.

yogurt with raw oats

Fart Pellets

pb and banana bagel thin

Side note- you must boil Udon noodles, not just stick in wok.

light Cake Batter ice cream. Ridonk.

Good stuff.

Now onto the important stuff….

Seriously guys, I am truly sick of talking about food, thinking about food, eating too much of the stuff–you get the idea. I just want to be NORMAL! I was so not in the mood for therapy this morning. If guilt didn’t exist, I wouldn’t have shown up. Yes, I wrote in my damn food journal. Yes, I ate like shit a few days this week. No, I was not neglected as a kid.

I spoke with Len about my dilemma last night and about how I was questioning the content/life of my blog. He reminded me that I started goodies galore as a tool in my therapeutic process. The problem is, I’m just not sure if it’s helping the process or enabling me to be more obsessed. Hear me barking? When I’m not thinking about food, I’m writing or reading about it.

Is there anything that you guys would like to see more of? Less of? Lots to think about over here.

Moving on– I wore my awesome hr monitor to booty this morning and burned 516 calories. Wahoooo! I love the fact that I burned that many calories before seven am. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings.

How cute is my family.

Clearly Eleanor runs the house and makes herself comfortable wherever she sees fit.

Sleeping Beauties.

P.S. 50% off lots of Easter candy at Shaws. For real.

April 13, 2010 Posted by | Boot camp, dogs, eating disorder, Food, Self Discovery, The Boyfriend, therapy | 15 Comments

Jump, Jump!

Hey, hoo, hey, hoo. I went to a Kriss Kross concert in 8th grade and wore my pants backwards. True Story.

So…. I hopped on the scale this morning and didn’t even lose a full one pound?! What the freak. I know I haven’t drastically cut back over the last two weeks but I haven’t binged on sweets or eaten any sweets for that matter. This HAS to have decreased my calorie intake. I’ve also been doing boot camp. I really expected to lose. Mimi advised me not to step on the scale so I wouldn’t get disappointed but  I’m stubborn. I’m not so disappointed that I want to stuff my face with 10 whoopee pies but I am left wondering what to do next.

Thanks for all the Easter eating tips. I still haven’t picked a strategy. I got a lot of advice about not letting the candy have power over me. The truth is, it does. One bite and I’m done. I definitely plan to remember how much better I feel without the sugar with hopes that it will inspire me to back away. “Back away, not today, Disco Lady.” Who knows what that’s from?

Last night I had a glorious dinner with a friend I met in grad school. She’s someone I felt instantly comfortable with so we had great conversation. Remember on Valentines Day when Len and I went to Bella Luna for an early dinner? Well Mikaela lives in the area and had never been so we hit it up. The place was packed and the atmosphere was so funky.

I started off with a Cherry Wheat beer. If you like cherry and you like beer, this is a great choice. I LOVED it and wanted to drink 17 more.

Although the intention was to order a black bean and portobello burger, I was swayed by the creamy tomato and basil soup. One cup please!

After  I took that picture the waitress arrived with garlic knots. Bitch. I had two.

Then came the Silver Moon Salad– dried cranberries, croutons, gorgonzola and field greens. So good. I ate every last bite.

Len and I are headed to CT around 2 today so I must get moving. Lots of errands/work to do. Who’s avoiding taxes till the last minute?  I am!!

Need advice for good running shoes for peeps with wide feet. My booty camp leader called me out on how old and ridiculous mine sneaks are.  I’ve been sticking with Nike only because of the Nike Plus thing.

April 2, 2010 Posted by | Boot camp, eating disorder, Family, Food, Friends, fun, running, Self Discovery, The Boyfriend, therapy, Weigh In | 22 Comments

Barren Fridge

Hey peeps (and not the Marshmallow kind). Sorry I’ve been MIA but honestly, I’ve got nothin’ for you. Really, I’m a big bore and have no exciting news.

Yesterdays dinner was borderline binge– lots of crackers and cheese, and soup with (you guessed it) more crackers. Earlier in the afternoon I had a HUGE peanut butter and jelly. By huge I mean that the bread slices were like couch cushions. I was bored and I ate. End of story. Interesting, right?

Len and I FINALLY hit up booty this morning. I felt really cranky on the way there but things got better quickly. It feels really good to be active again. Amen, sistas!

You guys would be bummed out at the inside of my fridge. Such a sad sight. I managed to put together some good eats today nonetheless. Breakfast= yogurt and cereal. Lunch= pb&j and veggies. Snack= grapes/strawberries and carrots with hummus. I’ve been OBSESSED with a new recipe my friend Michelle taught me–adding curry to hummus. I add tons and it’s awesome. I suppose you can make homemade curry hummus but I just add it to store-bought. Michelle also adds grapes but I didn’t do that this week.  Dinner= roasted potatoes and cheese slices. Not balanced but I’m desperate.

Now this is yummy!

I have a dinner date at Bella Luna tomorrow night with my friend Mikaela. I can’t wait!

Are you doing anything fun to celebrate Easter or Passover? Len and I are headed to Connecticut to spend time with my family. I’m really worried because my mother always has TONS and tons of candy, chocolate and sweets around the house. Not sure how I’m going to manage. Tips?

P.S. Is it wrong that I got really pissed off today when a very overweight 8 year old girl said, “I can’t wait to go home today so I can go to Burger King, even though I’m not supposed to eat there. We didn’t go yesterday so my mom promised we can go today.” Poor kid is going to have a tough life.

March 31, 2010 Posted by | Boot camp, eating disorder, Family, Food, Friends, fun, The Boyfriend, Workout | 25 Comments

Week of Review in Therapy

In therapy last week, we made two goals to focus on:

1. keeping a  food diary

2. Resist the sweets I usually cave into and play close attention to how I feel after saying NO.

I’m happy to say that I have not had any sweets since LAST Monday; seven days without cookies, candy, cakes, etc. I noticed that I’ve been compensating with cheese and bread. Saturday night I ate WAY too much cheese. I did this well after I was full, because it was there and I wanted sweets. Sunday night was the only time I was literally pissed that I couldn’t eat sweets. I wanted to bust into those damn mini eggs so bad and it annoyed me that I couldn’t. I reminded myself that I feel 7 thousand times better since last Monday and that I know exactly how the mini eggs taste. I’ve had them many times. That reasoning seemed to work for a little  but I did scope out something else to hold my attention: a hummus, cheese and ketchup sandwich.

This was after dinner. Again, after I was full and didn’t need anything more to eat. I was filling an emotional void.

This is a journey.

Although I’m feeling good about my accomplishment, I know that if I picked up a single piece of chocolate it would be binge city. Mimi says that eventually we will work on feeling safe eating everything in moderation, but for now I should keep doing what I’m doing.

Len and I skipped boot camp yesterday and today. I feel so guilty about it but not guilty enough to get out there in the rain. I hit the gym up today for a few miles so I feel better.  Eats so far today include:

breakfast:toast with pb

egg, veggie and cheese omelette with strawberries and bread

I have all day off so I hope to actually get things accomplished. Boredom= eating.

March 30, 2010 Posted by | Boot camp, eating disorder, Food, goals, The Boyfriend | 17 Comments

Pat on back

I thought for sure I’d see a weight loss this week but I stayed the same. There are several reasons I’m totally fine with this.

1. I got my period yesterday

2. I haven’t binged since Monday

3. I haven’t had a sweet treat since Monday

4. I started booty.

Overall, I’ve done a great job this week listening to my body’s needs and eating for fuel. I’ve never had two bags of chocolate (and mini eggs at that) sitting around my house without a binge happening. A true test. I can already feel a difference in my self-esteem, with or without weight loss.

I’m definitely a little worried about the next two days though. I have no clue what we’ll be doing, where we’ll be eating or what sweets will be lurking around the corner. Hopefully I’ll stay strong and make decisions that I’ll be happy about. It’s a fine line right now. If I cave and at shitty one day, it would definitely leak into the days to come.

Anyway, last night we made a wonderful spread of pepper jack cheese, light cheddar, Ritz crackers (for len), whole wheat crackers (for me), rustic bread,  two types of hummus, broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, cucumber, grapes, red wine (for me) and white wine (for Len).  Len hadn’t seen The Blind Side yet so we rented it. Such a great flick. If you haven’t yet seen it, I really encourage it. It will touch your heart, melt it, then make it happy.

God only knows...

I only had two glasses of wine but apparently Len took it to a different level. I had a feeling I’d be running alone when I noticed his empty bottle. Cheers!

What’s your favorite brand of cheap wine? Mine is Lindemans. It’s SOOOO good, though I can only speak for the Cab Sav and Merlot.

I’m off for the day and won’t be able to read about anyone’s lives till tomorrow night. I hope you have a fabulous weekend filled with fun and relaxation.

March 27, 2010 Posted by | Boot camp, eating disorder, Food, Friends, fun, running, Self Discovery, The Boyfriend, Weigh In, Workout | 10 Comments