Goodies Galore

Learning to focus less on dieting and more on overall health and wellness

Anyone want to jam?

Part of my year of fulfillment meant signing up for guitar lessons. I bought a guitar in 2000. Since then it has moved all over New England with me collecting dust. I have taken a bunch of lessons with a few different instructors but suck at practicing.

My very first instructor was an old pervert who tried to sell me a bag of pot at our second lesson. God only knows what he would have offered up by lesson four. No sir, I do not want to see your penis.  One lady taught from her one-room apartment, which was in an old folks home and smelled of moth balls and kitty litter. Poor Grace never stood a chance.  My last instructor was very good, though I think he might have been a heroin user. His house also served as a make-shift massage parlor. Bonus! Nevertheless, he was incredibly patient with me and quite cheap. He would let me stay late despite our one hour time frame. Eventually I quit because I wasn’t improving (aka not practicing) and felt embarrassed. Sorry, Keith. It was me, not you.

Most recently I signed up for group lessons in hopes that public shaming would be enough to make me practice. Guess what, it’s working.


Not to brag but I kinda look like a natural.

Rock star, bitches.

There are 11 people in our group. The instructor teaches us something and then we have to go around the room, one by one, and play the lesson. It’s incredibly scary when all eyes are on you. I have a tendency to laugh and smile when I’m nervous so that’s what happens when it’s my turn to play. Last week I panicked and said shit. Judy (the old goat in class) wasn’t impressed but John (the signature gay guy) quite liked it. He thanked me for being the first to curse because he was sure to “slip up”. Taking one for the team, that’s what I do.

Speaking of swearing, my mom stopped reading my blog because of my language. I’m working to tone it down a bit but can’t make any promises.

Check out this picture I saw on Alicia Silversontes blog. My heart melted to the floor.


Makes me feel guilty about eating the string cheese I packed for lunch. (That probably makes no sense to everyone but just go with it.)

Happy Monday!!


January 23, 2012 Posted by | Guitar, Year of fulfillment | 7 Comments